At the sound of the beep...

For the past two days, I've been tormented by two obnoxious sounds: the beep from my smoke detector, and the beep from my cell phone. After a sleepless night, I pity all new parents tending to wailing babies...

The smoke detector started up on Sunday and was so loud that even my neighbors upstairs could hear it. I tried to take off the cover and get to the battery. But my apartment property management team has it locked in place to prevent tampering. What good is that??? Almost as good as the fire extinguisher tied tightly to the pipes under the sink.... Had to wait until today to get it fixed... a good 30+ hours of beeping, once every minute. It was especially wonderful when complimented by the high pitched squeal coming out of my new cellphone.

About a month ago, the company switched us all to Verizon Wireless (I was already "IN") and Motorola Q phones (thanks, boss!). Wired magazine loved the Q and said it was the best phone out there, so I was pretty stoked.

But I've had two problems with my Q so far. First, the addicting game called Bubble Breaker. It's like Snood for the phone. So far I've logged 568 games. At approximately 3 minutes per game, I've wasted 1,704 minues of my life trying to beat my boss' high score in MegaShift mode. I wonder if there are support groups for this...

Second problem: the beeping. When it first started I would run to my phone anticipating a new message. Hopes deflated, I went back to my business. Until the beeping got more and more regular (it's already beeped twice since I started writing this).

By now I've read every manual that came with the phone (even the French version, just in case it read "Haha, stupid Americans! BEEP BEEP BEEP!"). But all I've figured out so far is that the beeping is a "WARNING." No clue what the warning is since it doesn't flash an alert on the screen. Everything looks fine to me -- no text messages, no voicemail, no new email.

As a last resort I turned off all sounds, including my homemade ringtone, "Consolation Prizes" by Phoenix (listen courtesy of Sandwich Club). But that cheeky phone has a mind of its own... now it's giving me both vibrating warnings and nosie warnings. How is that possible when the sound is off??

Having this Q is like babysitting a Tamagotchi! "What's wrong Q? Are you hungry? Do you need your battery changed?" I can't take it anymore! I want to throw it against a wall until it breaks into a thousand pieces!! Even then, I bet it would beep!!


... but then I realize I'd miss Bubble Breaker and need to get my fix from a coworker's phone. Damn you, Q, and your pretty features.

Sorry, Kip -- I do not love technology... try me again tomorrow...