Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Caren Explains the Songs You're Hearing During the Olympics

Things I Enjoy About the Olympics:
- That the gymnasts wear scrunchies...?
- Watching water polo!
- The commercials

And there are a lot of commercials to choose from... I've been surprised by how many of my favorite musicians have sold their music to commercials and TV promos [Ed: Notice I did not say "sold out"... I like to differentiate myself from hipsters who hate commercialism yet ironically embrace it].

Look at all the songs I've heard just this week!

"Sincerely Jane" by Janelle Monae, used in the Season 2 promo for "Lipstick Jungle" on NBC

"Crane Wife 3" by The Decemberists, used in a VISA commercial?? (clearly not a memorable commercial)

"Scar That Never Heals" by Jeremy Fisher, used in a VW Autobahn commercial

Hem featured in another Liberty Mutual ad

"The Story" by Brandi Carlile, used in a GM commercial

"Lazy Eye," Silversun Pickups, used in Chevy Malibu commercial

What other songs have you heard?

Monday, August 11, 2008

Caren Explains Her Break-Up With Her MacBook

I'm really depressed today.

I just broke-up with my MacBook. It was a short but intense relationship. We had a great weekend together -- setting up the wireless network, making playlists in iTunes, building photo albums, sitting together in the coffee shop...

But our relationship was doomed from the start. The relationship wasn't supported by my school, nor my cellphone, which only connects with PCs.

Yet we were so compatible! My friends thought so, too! When we were together, everything made sense... drag-and-drop, toggling between windows, photo editing... it was all so easy.

I stubbornly tried to fight everyone who said we couldn't be together. I partitioned the hard drive to run Windows simultaneously with Mac OS, but it was no use... I was putting too much pressure on Mac until it just broke down... seriously: the hardware broke.

Mac and I fought all this morning until I was in tears. I called Apple Care for support while Mac made a wailing, siren-like sound. I went to the Apple Store in hopes of reconciliation, but when I heard that Mac had in fact suffered a break down, I couldn't commit.

I miss you already, Mac. I know it's too soon to say that, but I do... and I know, deep down, that you were right to make this happen. But one day, when I'm done with school, I hope we can get back together... until then, I'll have to distract myself and see what else is on the market...

I hope you miss me, too.

Mark (a Mac user) made me this mix to help me through.

The Break-Up
1. "Let It Die," Feist
2. "If Loving You Is Wrong," O.B. McClinton
3. "Crown of Love," The Arcade Fire
4. "For Emma," Bon Iver
5. "Trials," Damien Jurado
6. "The Funeral," Band of Horses
7. "Lord, I'm Discouraged," The Hold Steady
8. "Last Goodbye," Jeff Buckley
9. "You Let Me Down," Billie Holiday
10. "Where Is My Love," Cat Power
11. "I'm So Lonesome (I Could Cry)," Atlas Sound
12. "No Expectations," The Rolling Stones
13. "Too Late," M83
14. "Fading Lights Are Fading Reign Rebuilder [Tail Out]," Set Fire to Flames
15. "Paris Night Diana," David Brent

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Caren Explains IKEA as a Relationship Test

A trip to IKEA should really be a requirement in all budding relationships -- a litmus test, if you will. Maybe ministers can add it to the list of things involved in pre-marital counseling classes.

I say this because you can learn a lot about a person based on how he or she tackles this Swedish Fun-House of Furnishings. Deciding how you want to live in 263 sq feet of space will reveal quite a bit about your...

- Patience
- Imagination
- Taste (or lack thereof)
- Spending habits
- Organizational skills

The true test, though, will be when the couple gets home and tries to assemble furniture called Utby and Malm using IKEA's cartoonish instructions, wooden pegs and strange screws.

Unfortunately this test should really be administered at the beginning of a relationship, but a new boyfriend or girlfriend to take you to IKEA might freak them out, kind of like this someecard: