A public service campaign, brought to you by the recording artists of the Billboard Hot 100.
What to do if you see danger at a dance club.
Option 1: Evacuate the dancefloor. If you fail to do so you will either become infected by the sound, or watch the DJ burn the place right down to the ground.
Option 2: Somebody call 9-1-1. If a shorty fire-burning on the dancefloor, call for emergency assistance. Be prepared to explain what a "shorty" is when you speak to a dispatcher, as it is unlikely that he or she will have an Urban Dictionary handy.
Option 3: Just dance (it's gonna be okay). According to Lady GaGa, "we're all getting hosed tonight" as it is, so why not keep dancing until the fire department arrives?